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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28981992">maybe I should take your word, believe in what you say</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/prongs_writes/pseuds/prongs_writes'>prongs_writes</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Voltron: Legendary Defender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Comforting Shiro (Voltron), Crying, Dark Past, Established Relationship, Heavy Angst, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, Keith (Voltron) Angst, Keith (Voltron) Is Not Okay, Lots of Crying, M/M, Protective Shiro (Voltron), please read responsibly, they're in love, toxic thoughts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:00:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,179</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28981992</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/prongs_writes/pseuds/prongs_writes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The shadows of Keith's past are sometimes too much for him to bear but he can always count on Shiro to chase them away</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Keith/Shiro (Voltron)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>65</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>maybe I should take your word, believe in what you say</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>it's a lot of angst so just consider yourself warned before you go into it</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Enough enough enough, Keith’s mind chanted. </p><p>He needed sleep. A lot of it. Preferably for an eternity. A quiet, soft, dreamless kind that left you drowsy and craving for more. He didn’t need dreams. He didn’t need pretty pictures and meaningless fantasies. He needed escape. </p><p>Anything was better than being awake. Anything was better than feeling what he was feeling. Anything was better than the all-encompassing, body-numbing, heart-shattering pain.</p><p>His heart was pounding heavily in his chest, filled with fear as his hands shook. They trembled where he was holding a glass of water. Keith pressed it to his lips, the glass cold and soothing against his heated skin as he took a greedy gulp. The water helped him chase the last bits of sleep away, waking his brain up as he slammed the glass against the counter with a small wince. The sound echoed through the quiet apartment.</p><p>He ran a hand through his hair. It was messy, sticking out in all directions from rolling around in his bed but Keith couldn’t bring himself to care as he squeezed his eyes shut and forced long, deep breaths into his lungs. One, two, three, in. Three, two, one, out.</p><p>It was a struggle, taking away every last bit of his energy as he focused it, begging himself, the universe, anyone for the prickling behind his eyes to disappear. His ears felt like cotton candy was stuffed inside of them, buzzing and ringing with distant sounds of his nightmares. </p><p>Keith tried to focus on his breathing and breathing alone but there was no way for him to get away from himself. Away from his brain. It screamed, shouted, hissed at him. Filled him with doubt that shook him to his core and punched the breath out of his lungs. It felt as if a phantom hand had been wrapped around his throat, squeezing and clutching and not letting go as Keith trashed and fought against it.</p><p>The dark shadow Keith tried to escape—thought he escaped—was back over him. Heavy and sticky. Cold and possessive as it dug its claws in Keith’s skin, crawling and clutching at all it could reach as Keith didn’t put up any fight because what was the use? There was no escaping it. He could run and hide all he wanted but it would always come to strike again. Harsher and more painful than before, its touch merciless and angry. </p><p>Keith ached where he stood in the dark kitchen, the tiles cold against his bare feet as he tipped his head back and huffed a frustrated breath. But he could huff and puff all he wanted, the ache he felt wouldn’t go away. Instead, something uncomfortable twisted in his stomach, making him want to double over and fall on his knees like a little child scared of the world when in all reality the only thing he was scared of was himself and the stupid feeling he couldn’t shake away.</p><p>If the shadow could, it would laugh. Some mean, gleeful sound that would make Keith’s body go rigid in fear. He probably looked pathetic, all disheveled and weak, but Keith couldn’t move. He stood frozen on the spot, breath completely shallow as he struggled to latch onto any sense of stability and hope. Any bit of light in the darkness of his mind that felt suffocating. But the shadow was faster, its whispers tempting and caress gentle as it twisted its claws around his heart one more time and dug them in and the dam broke. </p><p>The tears he had been trying to hold in suddenly wouldn’t stop flowing. Steady, salty streams going through his thick lashes, down his pale cheeks, lips, chin, and onto the floor. His shoulders shook. A whimper bullied its way past his lips before he could stop it and he knew he was pathetic. He knew he was ridiculous. </p><p>And he also knew that he lost yet another fight the moment he gave in. </p><p>His knees gave out and he hit the floor with a dull thud. Keith curled in on himself, hugged his knees, pulled at his hair, clutched his ears, bit on his lips but nothing stopped the sobs from shaking his whole frame. A pit opened in his stomach, aching and burning and sucking away all of the hope as dread crawled up his skin. </p><p>If the shadow was laughing before, it was straight-up singing from happiness now, dancing over Keith’s frame, usually so big but looking so small then. Running its greedy claws over his skin, tugging on his heartstrings in the cruelest of ways. Feeding on his pain and fears, licking up his whimpering soul and weak heart.</p><p>His brain screamed at him, prompted by Keith’s unsparing companion, throwing whatever it could at him and making him crumble under the weight of its words. “Stop, stop, stop,” Keith cried and sobbed to himself, small hiccups and whimpers escaping him in the dead of the night with his demons as his only witnesses and company. He felt alone. He was alone in it all. No hope. No light. Only dark and pain and cold. </p><p>Or so he thought. </p><p>In all his pain-filled haze, he failed to hear the familiar set of footsteps when they left the bedroom and rounded the corner. They stopped to halt only to cross the distance between them in quick, long strides. Heat came off of the body which fell next to his own, big and sturdy and safe safe safe. </p><p>Strong hands wrapped around his wrists. Warm, steady, grounding. Rubbed into his pulse points, gently pried his hands away from where they were clutching at his face followed by a soft hush that only spurred Keith on more. </p><p>He looked up at the set of gray eyes, usually soft and filled with nothing but love, only to catch them swimming with nothing but deep worry and concern from where they were looking down at him. They looked alert, more awake than Keith himself felt, and calculating as they scanned his face. </p><p>It took one look at them and Keith was gone. What little composure, decency, control he had managed to slip away as Keith finally let go and allowed the shadow to take him all in with not even a tip of a finger left behind. He whined, a high, pitiful sound, and then promptly threw himself against his lover's firm body, clinging onto him like a little child and crying into his shoulder like there was no tomorrow. </p><p>Shiro was quick to wrap his arms around Keith, squeezing and holding and pulling Keith close close close until he was all but seated in his lap, head pressed into the crook of Shiro’s neck, and arms clutching to the back of his shirt. “It’s okay. It’s okay, Keith,” Shiro soothed, ran his hand up and down Keith’s back in long and steady strokes, and pressed him that much closer until their chests were flush together. </p><p>Keith struggled to breathe and once he finally did, there was the scent that was so distinctly Shiro filling his nose, lungs, senses. It was like a balm to the injury, instantly soothing and relaxing. Shiro’s hold was strong and firm and Keith felt as if he would have completely fallen apart if it weren’t for his lover who held him with a care Keith hadn’t had a chance to feel before him. </p><p>Shiro’s chest slowly rose and fell and Keith found himself trying to match the movement. The soft, hushed reassurances continued to flow past Shiro’s lips, his voice a deep rumble, soothing and gentle and reserved for Keith and Keith only. At one point, Shiro had moved them and they were back in their bed, bodies pressed close, legs entangled, arms holding onto each other tightly. A heavy blanket was tossed over them which didn’t do anything to stop Keith’s shaking. </p><p>Keith pressed his ear against Shiro’s chest, listened to the steady beat of his heart as his own matched it. He was still clutching onto Shiro’s shirt, hand bunching the material, and threatening to tear through it. But Keith was far too scared to let go, the irrational fear of Shiro disappearing taking over him and making him panic. He whimpered involuntarily and Shiro was quick to chase it away, voice so sure and warm as he spoke.</p><p>“I’m here. It’s okay. It’ll be okay. I’ve got you, love,” he whispered. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” he managed to get out, head shaking and eyes squeezed shut as shame burned in him, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to-”</p><p>“Stop that,” he chided but there was no malice behind it, only soft care and worry, “You don’t ever have to apologize to me, Keith.”</p><p>But there was that voice, that powerful whisper in the back of his head and from the depth of his gut that wouldn’t go away. Keith couldn’t help but curl closer to Shiro, hold a bit tighter, burying his face into his chest. He wished to hide there forever, in the safety of his lover’s hold where it was warm and soft and the shadow couldn’t get to him. </p><p>Shiro ran a gentle hand through Keith’s hair, fingers gently carding through dark strands, and moving them away from his tear-soaked face. There was an awful wet stain on his shirt and Keith felt bad for ruining it but Shiro didn’t seem to mind. </p><p>All the while, Shiro talked. Voice quiet in their dark bedroom, secretive, and for Keith’s ears only as words of praise, love, care flowed into Keith’s ear where Shiro’s lips were pressed close. They made Keith’s toes curl and sent a shiver down his spine and all Keith wanted to do was to tell Shiro to stop but he couldn’t because he needed it. Craved it. Desperately wanted to take as much as Shiro was willing to give like a starved man. </p><p>It was always a struggle to believe him. To actually take the words Shiro said so confidently to heart and not toss them away with fear and disgust only moments later. It took a long time for Shiro to make it that far with Keith, to finally stop him from running and escaping, and to get him to accept each and every word Shiro so earnestly meant. </p><p>And Keith tried. He really did. He wanted to believe. Returning the words was never an issue but holding onto them and trusting them was proven to be too hard of a task for him. They’d always get lost in the screams of his brain. The doubts, the fears, the insecurities. </p><p>His heart would reject them, chase them out and away, refuse to take any of them in, and let them make their home there where they’d be nestled and safe just like Shiro was. They’d become rotten, their sweetness lost as they got tinged by the darkness. Their warmth gone as they’d remain to lay cold and heavy and useless in the dark pit that was Keith.</p><p>But Shiro never gave up, always pushed harder, gave more. He repeated and repeated and repeated each of them every time Keith needed it and Keith feared that he would get too much, become too big of a burden. That Shiro would just one day get bored and give up and leave but he never did. He was always there, just like in that moment, with his words which dripped with nothing but pure, undiluted honesty and love. His light that chased the shadows and demons away.</p><p>Slowly, but surely, the thick claws started to loosen their hold, slithering and inching away bit by bit until Keith was finally able to breathe again. The pain lessened. His stomach stopped squirming. The tears on his face dried, leaving behind flushed cheeks and puffy eyes which he safely hid in Shiro’s neck. </p><p>Hesitantly, Keith let his hold on Shiro go slack, hands softly pressing against his strong back as he got lost in the silence that fell between them. Shiro was back to stroking Keith’s back, movements lazy and absent-minded but Keith knew that he was still awake, alert, and ready for action if needed. </p><p>His heart swelled, the pain it was filled with getting replaced by the never-ending love he felt for the man in his arms, threatening to burst and overflow. He leaned back, looked at Shiro whose face was calm, open, waiting. Keith’s eyes softened, swimming with love and gratitude as he leaned in.</p><p>He pressed their lips together into a deep kiss, whispered a soft, “Thank you,” against them once they separated, and nestled back into Shiro’s arms, where he was safe and secure and loved. </p><p>Shiro pressed a kiss on top of his head, pulled him closer, buried his face into the mess that was Keith’s hair. He said nothing but he didn’t have to. Keith heard every unspoken word and he was overflowing with gratitude for all of them. </p><p>Keith fell asleep to the sound of Shiro’s steady heartbeat, holding onto his light. His hope. His love.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>back at it again with my bullshit but what else is new? perhaps one day I'll write something that is not angst but today is not the day. hope you enjoyed it.</p><p>you can find me on other social media too:<br/>IG: @atheghostqueen or @prongs_writes<br/>Twitter: @atheghostqueen</p></blockquote></div></div>
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